What Is a Thriving Mindset? How to Build One for Success & Growth
“A thriving mindset is all about becoming empowered to have a positive, growth-oriented, and resilient attitude. With a thriving mindset, we grow to be proactive and more aligned to our goals, while also becoming equally capable of co-creating environments where ourselves and the ones we care for can thrive and reach their full potential.”
– Terry Dubroy
Let’s investigate a topic that is central to living our best lives: the thriving mindset.
What is a thriving mindset? It’s a state of mind that allows us to shift from merely surviving in a constant battle against our lives, to channeling more confident, resilient, and authentic versions of ourselves.
The lens in which we choose to view ourselves and our circumstances profoundly shapes the extent to which our experiences will be positive or negative. Learning to cultivate a thriving mindset enables us to have more positive, productive perceptions – therefore, our experiences and life satisfaction becomes better, too.
Positive psychology frequently highlights the ability that we have on an individual level to rewire our minds towards healthier, more constructive thoughts and mental states. Consider the concept of a ‘growth mindset’, coined by Dr. Carol Dweck in her groundbreaking 2006 book, Mindset: The New Psychology of Success:
“A growth mindset represents the idea that with effort, an openness to learning, and persistence, our abilities, talents, and even intelligence can develop over time. In contrast, believing that all of these parts of ourselves do not have the ability to shift connotes a fixed mindset, and we stagnate as a result. A growth mindset encourages us to embrace challenges resiliently, remain open to constructive criticism, talk to ourselves kindly and with strong self-belief, and value being in the moment with the process as opposed to yearning for the outcome.”
A thriving mindset strongly correlates with a growth mindset, and is our team’s unique way of shedding light on this phenomenon.
By reflecting on the qualities that enable a thriving mindset and the obstacles that prevent them, you can begin to make small mindset changes that support your personal growth. Let’s examine the ways in which we can learn to adopt a thriving mindset to a greater capacity.
1. Becoming willing to develop a positive, growth-oriented, resilient attitude. The key word here is willing. You truly do not need to be any specific kind of personality or come from any specific set of circumstances and privileges to be able to change your attitude. You just need to muster a deeper state of willingness within yourself to make changes.
Terry Dubroy, Founder and CEO of Thrive: Enabling Potential, writes in his book Transformative Education about how his philosophical approach to teaching mirrors this aspect of thriving. He notes in the book that he always makes an effort to appreciate and uplift the student in the room who makes the greatest effort to become better, even if they’re moving from a 65% to a 75%, rather than ignoring their efforts to constantly champion the naturally gifted student who achieves 90s with ease.
Likewise, we must appreciate ourselves for making efforts to dig out of darker mindsets and educate ourselves about how to embrace new ones. As soon as we become willing to explore what growth can look like, questioning our perceived limitations and how we can change our minds for the better, we’ve already set ourselves up to walk in a better direction.
2. Embracing challenges. What if we viewed challenges as our teachers instead of as blockages that ruin our days? As Terry Dubroy writes in Transformative Education, what if we still found the value that there is when the sun is hiding behind the clouds?
Challenge is a part of life – just a part. Although it can feel all-encompassing in the moment, we can shift our minds to a big-picture perspective and realize that it’s not here to swallow us whole. From a thriving mindset, we can view challenges as experiences that are giving us the push we need to expand, and down the line, we can reflect to find even more profound meanings that they had in shaping us into stronger, more resilient individuals.
Consider the powerful anecdote about mindset shifts that Terry Dubroy and Tony Cox relayed in the Thriving Perspectives podcast episode “The Thriving Mindset: Navigating Fixed Mindset Beliefs”:
“Through our decades of working together, Tony, we’ve heard those scripts play out loud before. We've been out on portages or rock climbing at high altitudes, and we’ll start to hear people say out loud, ‘No, I can't.’
We always gently remind people in those moments to become aware, first of all, that they’re telling themselves something negative. Then we invite them to shift their “I can’t” to an “I can”. We’ve witnessed so many people work out their mental blockages, complete the challenge successfully, and have an unforgettable experience as a result of that simple nudge to become aware and make a shift.
With every iteration of negative words, it's like we're assembling a brick wall between us and our goal. We put a brick down and on goes some mortar every time that we say ‘Can’t’ again. And then it just builds up and builds up and builds up until the resistance feels so tangible that we believe it. But when we start to tell ourselves we can, we’re no longer even tending to that brick wall, and instead we’re adventuring to a completely different destination. We simply let go and leave it behind, and that’s the power of realizing that we truly can transform our thoughts.”
– Terry Dubroy & Tony Cox
3. Opening to new perspectives. Those with a thriving mindset do not believe that they have the best mentality, routine, or otherwise. Instead, they tap into a beginner’s mind and consistently remain open-minded to the ideas and opinions of others.
You can adopt a thriving mindset by humbling yourself to the moments where your perspective is incorrect, rather than clinging to a ‘my-way-or-the-highway’ mentality. Additionally, you could open yourself to new perspectives by becoming more of an intellectual explorer – reading widely and deeply, initiating conversations, and immersing yourself in new, uncomfortable experiences.
4. Adapting to change. As we write in the Walking the High Road series, change is a constant in life (just like challenge is). When we maintain a fixed mindset in the face of change, we end up failing to allow it to be our teacher.
Sometimes it is important to be more one-track minded and grounded, for instance, if you are pushing yourself to stick to a consistent routine. When circumstances are less predictable, you don’t have to adapt to change as much and can focus more of your energy on being fixated on one particular thing. But consider the times in your life where unpredictability and the unknown are at play. In the work environment, this could manifest as an unexpected situation that requires you to think quickly. You might want to allow yourself to be more like moving water in such a situation, going with the flow and adapting to the energies at hand. Not only will this help you to grow as a person, but it will help you to be the best that you can for others.
5. Seeking opportunities for both personal & professional growth. If you want to thrive in your life, you may have to move from becoming a ‘sitter’ to a ‘seeker’ – from waiting for things to magically fall into your lap to openly exploring the world to find them.
Terry Dubroy has often relayed to myself and many of his mentees a valuable truism for becoming more of a seeker – that, if you want to be struck by lightning, you shouldn’t be hiding in your basement. You’d be much better off going out into an open field during a storm with a metal rod in hand. In other words, we have to put ourselves into uncomfortable situations to explore possibilities in order to feel better about our lives within.
6. Maintaining a proactive and positive view on life. I know; when I hear the phrase ‘just be positive’ I vomit in my mouth a bit, because just like you I know that life is often difficult and we need to give ourselves time and space to feel complex emotions.
However, by being more proactive, self-care oriented, and conscientious during challenging circumstances, the lows don’t feel as low as they would if we were not looking ahead and taking care. Staying committed to basic self-care practices when we are navigating our lows, like going on mental health walks, communicating in our relationships, and getting adequate nutrition, can help us not dig our rabbit holes any deeper than they need to be.
7. Reflecting on and focusing on your goals. An individual with a fixed mindset will often set goals as a form of strict punishment, as a way to make themselves put their heads down and grind towards an endpoint. However, an individual with a thriving mindset finds spiritual nourishment through actively reflecting on whether their lives are aligned with their true purpose in the long term, and what they can modify on a daily basis on subtle levels to make their visions a reality.
When I think about someone who has a thriving mindset versus someone who does not, I automatically think of the metaphor of being on a ‘journey’ that Terry and I elucidate in our book The Insightful Journey. Consider a short but potent quote from the book: “The journey is the end point”. It’s impossible to capture how you can embody a thriving mindset without highlighting that it is always an ongoing journey. A thriving mindset is not something you accomplish like winning a gold medal and never have to challenge yourself to obtain again. It is rather more like a training season that never ends. Some seasons you will be stronger or weaker than others, all depending on how much intentional effort you put into making new, open-minded attempts.
Journaling Prompts for a Thriving Mindset
The 7 journal prompts below are inspired by the 7 obstacles that can prevent a thriving mindset. If you’re ready to dig deep into your personal growth journey, choose one of the reflection prompts that speak to you below to fine-tune your thriving mindset.
What fixed-mindset beliefs are underpinning the behaviours that are holding me back? For instance, are things not changing for the better in my life, and is it because I believe they can’t get any better?
How can I become more resilient in my life? What deeper motivation do I need to embrace challenges?
Are my current goals unattainable or too rigid?
Have I been engaging in negative self-talk or self-doubt? How can I transmute these thoughts?
Do I seek validation from others too much? How can I validate myself?
Do I compare myself to others too much? How can I refocus on my own journey?
Have I been impatient lately? What strategies or mindsets do I think could help me pause and refrain in such moments?
